February.

There's only 8 days left in February and so far I've posted once. I haven't felt as motivated to blog lately. I've said it once, and I'll say it again - reader participation really does help in wanting to keep the "conversation" going (hint, hint!). But it also comes down to a lack of energy to write out my thoughts into something worth reading.

In any case, here's a montage of everything I've thought about blogging about and never got around to it:

On us...

 

We celebrate four years of marriage this month!

Tim is a month into his second semester at CSU. I'm liking his new schedule because it allows him more time at home, though we know we need to be careful in setting aside blocks of time for him to study. If all goes according to plan, he should have his English degree at the end of this year. We are so grateful for this time together, knowing that once he has a full time job all of that will change. We are so blessed. We are also so thankful that he has been healed by God of his chronic, intense, all-over joint pain through the use of magnet/infrared therapy. Sounds crazy I know, but it worked for him!

I am still enjoying my time at home with the boys, though cabin fever is beginning to take it's toll. I find myself losing my patience more and my tendency to yell increasing. Being indoors all the time with two active boys is challenging, both mentally and physically. Sometimes I feel like a caged animal.Facing all my health challenges has definitely added to my frustrations, but these seem to be on the upswing (praise the Lord!) so I'm hopeful. I truly can not wait for spring to be here so we can break out of winter hibernation. That all said, I count it a privilege to be a stay at home mom and I will always choose raising them myself versus another career path.

This year holds a lot of exciting things, including Tim graduating, new and exciting ventures, getting to go back to England (I can't wait!), returning to Goderich, and possibly trying for Baby # 3 - but not until the fall/winter and only if my health is stable.

On faith....

source

So thankful that God is bringing us into a new and better understanding of the Gospel message and that His
G R A C E is so key, so YES! I am praising God today that for the first time in a long time I have the assurance of salvation and I can stand and say with C E R T A I N T Y that I am saved and that it is by the blood of Christ alone shed for me! How could I ever let that be taken from me? And not only that but the joy that is found in the Lord, the freedom from not being under the Law, and the deep, unending love of God for me? What Tim and I both hunger for is more of the joy of the Lord and a deeper understanding of the depth of His love for us. To truly believe those words in Zephaniah that declare:

"The Lord your God is with you,

the Mighty Warrior who saves.

He will take great delight in you;

in his love He will no longer rebuke you,

but will rejoice over you with singing."

I think we have been lacking in certain areas because we doubted His love for us, his boundless compassion and forgiveness - that even on our worst days, when our obedience to His commands was left wanting, we were never beyond the reach of His grace. God IS jealous for our hearts and DOES love us passionately. Why is that so hard for me to receive? Being in His Word (which I have always struggled with) is helping every day to know Him more. From my study of the Old Testament, I'm learning that the character of God is F A I T H F U L and P A T I E N T.  The picture of having a heart of stone these past several years keeps coming to mind, and of God breathing L I F E back into my spirit makes me think of Ezekial 11:19:

"I will give them an undivided heart and put a new spirit in them;
I will remove from them a heart of stone and give them a heart of flesh." 

I am excited as we move forward into old Truths that have become new again. I pray these Truths continue to transform our hearts and renew our minds.

On the boys....

 

They both fell in love with Raffi through watching this concert on youtube. God bless that man. His presence and song create the proverbial happy place for young and old alike. I grew up loving his music and I'm so glad my boys love him too. Here they are watching together on the living room floor. It twas short lived, but sweet nonetheless.

Individually, 

Jack is pushing all my buttons lately. Maybe it's because we took away his naps so that he'd go to bed at night without a fuss (and by fuss I mean getting up every few minutes for an hour and a half after bed time), but man is that little guy feisty these days. His new thing is saying "But...." followed by some sort of argument as to why he should or shouldn't be doing something.  So frustrating. I know he's only two and a half, but he has the communication skills of a four year old, so I tend to expect more maturity out of him than maybe I should. Figuring out this parenting thing is exhausting and I'm so keenly aware that my anger and impatience is not helping anything. I asked Jack the other night what I could do to be a better mom to him and he said "Play." So true. I admit I have a short attention span for toddler games. Plus, I think we're all overtired which just makes room for more crying (including me!) That all said, I'm daily blown away by how bright and attentive Jack is. That he's sweet, generous and thoughtful. He verbalizes his love and is quick to compliment. And he's a good little boy. This past weekend a lady came up to me while we were out for ice cream to tell me how thankful she was to see children like Jack who were well behaved.  I'm grateful she took the time to share that with me.

Moses (Bobes, more often) is getting into everything now that he's mobile and almost walking. He's taken about five steps, but tends to prefer crawling. If you scold him when he's touching something he shouldn't, he gives you a crooked little grin and then does it again. Oi ve. But I know there's not real mischevious nature behind it, just a playful nature. Moses has the best laugh once you get him going - it's right from the belly. I look foward to the day where he and I can have a conversation and he and Jack can be eachother's best friend.

The end.